Day 30: Entertain Me

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing entertainment to occupy most of my time daily.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to value entertainment more than supporting myself in my world every single time I choose a TV show over studying or doing what needs to be done to continue leading my life.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing abuse as the thought, “I still have time to waste indulging in self compromise like watching another TV show for another 30 minutes”, meaning that I tempt fate every time I am faced with the free choice of watching TV or doing what needs to be done.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be arrogant by/through tempting fate when I accept and allow myself to commit the same mistake again, especially when that mistake is specifically limiting me from doing what I in fact need to do for myself to support myself in my world.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to constantly and continuously place myself in a position of regret/guilt/shame only to have to forgive myself yet again for wasting most of my time on preoccupying my Mind and entertaining myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to abuse self forgiveness every time I make the same mistake again, and in spite of knowing this, repeatedly making the same mistake and forgiving myself for the mistake out of the excuse/justification that I feel good when doing what I alone have made familiar to my daily participation.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to torture myself by/through constantly asserting my decision of who I am to an extremely specific point of resistance/inner conflict, and constantly making the same mistake of following the resistance; in spite of already knowing where I am ending up for doing the same mistake.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to mock my own self will when I constantly have to will myself to forgive myself for making the same mistake, starting from the beginning again, and then making the same mistake again.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to waste my own time by/through making the same mistake repeatedly, and then even have the arrogance of blaming external factors like the time of day and my mood for not doing what needs to be done as a decision made one moment at a time.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself the convenience of abdicating self responsibility when I blame everything and everyone EXCEPT for myself for placing myself in a position of limitation that has its one and equal consequences that I have walked and already confirmed that I would rather not go through again.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to see/realise/understand that no one and nothing can or will change myself for me, and I alone must make the decision for me alone to stop and live the obvious self corrections required to change and walk one step closer to being capable of living what is best for all in every moment no matter what happens.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to see/realise/understand that in the context of self change, I am the most capable of making that decision to stop my current habits/patterns of living to establish habits/patterns that are best for all.

When I face resistance/negative mood swing, I stop – I breathe. I accept and allow myself to push and continue asserting my decision of who I am because resistance means that I am facing a point of actual change that threatens the existence of myself as the Mind. I accept and allow myself to use the breath to assert my decision of who I am by/through deciding on doing something that will assist and support me walking in this world IN THIS MOMENT, and simply doing it one breath at a time.

I commit myself to investigate what it means to decide for myself what I live in thought, word, and deed instead of rattling noise inside my head as thoughts/emotions/feelings.

I commit myself to practice asserting the decision of who I am in every moment of resistance, as part of every moment of breath.

I commit myself to redefining how I live throughout the day by/through the smaller as every moment of breath because this is the ONLY way to actually change, so I give myself the opportunity to value every moment of breath equally to give myself every opportunity to stop and establish habits/patterns of living that are best for all; giving to others a living example of a person that I would like to receive.

About Kasper Kwan

Currently supporting myself in the process of establishing my words in the physical principles of Oneness and Equality. Had to start this process because I have allowed and accepted my words to be established in the mental idea of self-interest/greed, and only realised this recently.
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