Day 34: Feeling Self Conscious

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be/become self conscious so that my thoughts/emotions/feelings as incessant noise in my head alone decides who I am, instead of me deciding for myself who I am.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to spite others in a direct relationship with me, when I choose the noise of my personal and hidden thoughts/emotions/feelings over the consideration of others as I would consider myself in their shoes of practical physical responsibilities.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define considering others – which is often as simple as stopping participation in thoughts and immediate physical self correction within AND without – as apparently discouraging/self demeaning.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define self worth according to the devaluing of others when I choose for a moment to participate in thoughts/emotions/feelings at the cost of listening/HERE-ing what others are communicating, as one physical implication of believing that shutting up my internal thoughts to hear another person is apparently self demeaning.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that a condition to value myself is to devalue others, by/through shifting attention from others to who I THINK I am, instead of seeing/realising/understanding that only the ‘who I am’ that enables me to practically lead my life – that MUST include the consideration of others as their practical daily responsibilities and the part I have accepted and allowed myself to play in it – is real value.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to, through my Mind as thoughts/emotions/feelings, generate a delusion of free choice where I must either pay attention to myself or another person within/as separation.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to see/realise/understand that paying attention to what is here includes BOTH myself and others, so I do not have to limit myself and create a separation between my thoughts and what I communicate to others.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to attempt to decide between facing others and facing myself as my own thoughts from a starting point of fear: fear of what others would think of me for the thoughts that are coming up.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think about what others might think of me, in spite of the obvious reality that I have no idea of what others are thinking about me except for the judgments I attach to their reactions to/towards me, that are not even about me but about other people themselves, one and equal to how my apparent declarations to myself about what other people are thinking are in fact points I have made up on my own by/through participating in self judgment.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to tacitly claim and believe myself to be superior in ACTION by/through participating in the action of seeing/realising/understanding that my own reactions to/towards other people are in fact my reactions to/towards parts of myself, yet failing to recognize that other people are likely doing the exact same thing to justify their own reactions to/towards me and others as me, due to all living beings sharing only ONE reality together.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to tacitly claim and believe myself to be superior when I take other people’s reactions personally: believing other people to react because of me and what I am doing/living/applying, and conveniently neglecting that they may be reacting because of their own beliefs as one part of themselves for example, one and equal to how often I have blamed others for my negative reactions, only to ALWAYS inevitably see/realise/understand that I am responsible for my own experiences, including the negative reactions I experience.

About Kasper Kwan

Currently supporting myself in the process of establishing my words in the physical principles of Oneness and Equality. Had to start this process because I have allowed and accepted my words to be established in the mental idea of self-interest/greed, and only realised this recently.
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