Continued from Day 55: Boss Character
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to adopt a boss character as a reaction to protect/defend myself from facing past live memory moments where I interpreted myself to be a victim of authority.
I commit myself to face the memories I have attached to situations involving authority.
I commit myself to investigate the process I had walked to mislead myself to trust my Mind as reactions of thoughts/emotions/feelings fabricating innumerable characters, instead of trusting myself as who I really am as Life within/as every moment of breath. It is easy to see when I am participating in the Mind: it’s those moments where I am dissatisfied with walking my Life one moment of breath at a time.
I commit myself to show that separating myself from authority, when I rely on characters to live authority, is a dysfunctional habit/pattern because in no way do I consider the effect this character would have on others as living beings; only on the judgments of others that I again deliberately attached to the image of others. Therefore I commit myself to show that the only point that anyone can trust to consider others and give to others what I would like to receive as a living being is being/becoming the living being that I have always been, only hidden and suppressed through separation as the participation in thoughts/emotions/feelings that accumulate into characters and actual voices in my head telling me what to do.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing the belief that if I were more strict with myself, I would achieve more of the goals I set out to achieve.
I commit myself to show that the emotion of strictness and discipline is irrelevant to moving and directing myself to do what needs to be done, to be where I would like to be within/as myself and my world: what is relevant is that I constantly make decisions that are best for all such as the decision to be honest with myself in every moment of breath, and to direct points that do not support all to support all, within/as living in ways that are best for all.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to, within/as creating a boss character, be strict with myself where part of the strictness originate from an accepted and allowed self judgment of myself being a slacker.
I commit myself to show the uselessness of judging oneself to be anything, good or bad, because the only point that will accumulate to what is best for all is if I stop judging myself and to learn from what is here as myself and my world, and move on within/as living out my decisions to the end, in self awareness that the end/consequences of my decisions are always realised in the beginning of making that decision.
I commit myself to take responsibility for making the deliberate self decision to be a slacker, so that within/as this self responsibility, I am able to stop being a slacker and do what needs to be done to consistently support myself as living being in the world.
I commit myself to investigate and stop my emotional attachment to memories that justify me judging and defining myself to be a slacker and a lazy person.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define myself according to a slacker that requires discipline, when I interpret myself to be giving myself the necessary strictness within/as being a boss character to/towards myself and my world.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to victimize myself when I be/become a boss character, because I have defined being a boss according to protecting and defending myself from ever being a victim again; avoiding at all cost repeating past moments of negative experiences that I had with authority/bosses.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing the belief that if I do not stress myself within/as being a boss to/towards myself, I will not do what needs to be done.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define myself to be a slacker and a lazy person.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to react to/towards how I have defined myself as a slacker by/through becoming the opposite polarity of the utmost strictness that I portray while being a boss character I have designed in my Mind.
I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to in fact trust myself when I abdicate responsibility for my self movement/self direction to a boss character to boss myself around to what I need to do in my Life.