The self righteous voice that imbues us with a feeling of fulfillment when winning a verbal fight. What about the experiences we impose onto everyone involved when we blindly chase after such petty moments of seeming victory?
This post is about the Self Righteous Argument Winner Character and what I have realised through the simple but effective tool of forgiving myself first.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I am actually considering what is best for all when I separate myself into a voice in my head that asks, “Is this best for all?”.
When/as a voice in my head speaks an instruction or any form of opinion/knowledge/information, I stop, I breathe, I do not accept or allow myself to trust a voice in my head because I realise and accept that it is irrational to trust a voice to decide for me, when I have every opportunity/moment to decide for myself. I accept and allow myself to STOP the voice in the head because trusting myself within/as self trust and self hONEsty practically means that EVERY 1 + 1 accumulation of decisions/moments/actions/experiences MUST come from a starting point where I am absolutely certain/aware that I am the one that made the decision and willed myself to live/apply that decision; I Must be the only market force/external force that push me to move/direct a habit/pattern into manifestation, such that when a habit/pattern that is best for all is not lived, I see/realise/understand that there is absolutely no excuse except for the excuse I give myself to deceive myself within playing games of separating myself.
I commit myself to show that any point of self change is always possible, and when it has not been lived in fact = self responsibility remains because my Mind as thoughts/emotions/feelings – reactions – are ultimately only able to be created and imposed onto myself, by myself. So, I commit myself to dig deeper to find the root point of self sabotage and self dishonesty when/as I find that I am not applying a point of self change as I had previously decided to. Therefore I commit myself to remain dedicated and diligent in applying the tools of writing, self forgiveness, and self corrective application to give my life as directive principle of habits/patterns back to myself as the gift hidden in plain sight as self responsibility.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to react in anticipation and excitement when/as I ask myself, “Is this best for all”, when the action I am considering is clearly not within the boundaries of social norms, that I already judge as unacceptable.
I commit myself to show that every way ever invented to hide my greed as active pursuit of MY wants/needs/desires do not change the consequences I accumulate for myself within/as pursuing my wants/needs/desires in deliberate ignorance of what I did to myself.
I commit myself to walk the process to see/realise/understand that the social norms that I interpret myself to be bound/limited by, are in fact judgments that I alone imposed onto myself in a desperate attempt to seize control of myself, in the face of feeling as if I had lost control of myself. I walk this process by/through stopping ALL judgments I make about myself and/or my world/other people/events/circumstances, and to simply apply/live the necessary self corrective application when I recognize that I had participated in a judgment. If necessary, I commit myself to investigate why/how I had created a virtual need for a specific point of judgment to affect my decisions and actions, by/through writing, self forgiveness, and self corrective application.
I commit myself to show that within/as anticipation and excitement, I am in fact following my own fear and witnessing myself use my own fear to drive me to obtain/possess positive experiences of myself.
When/as I am imposing social norms onto myself, I stop, I breathe, I accept and allow myself to stop relying on social norms to guarantee a favourable outcome for my life. I accept and allow myself to apply/live myself in the trust that what is here created everything that I am facing, SO I apply myself here within/as remaining here. I do not accept or allow myself to give myself a backdoor excuse to blame social norms when/as I do not achieve that which I have originally decided to by/through NOT accepting or allowing myself to rely on social norms in any way whatsoever to affect any of my decisions. I accept and allow myself to consider self responsibility by/through closing all backdoors as potentials to blame and exert spite, and to instead remain here with myself in/as walking the process of understanding – to absolute detail – my own creation, such as the social norms I have created in the good intention to ensure that I win the most positive experiences possible, under the belief that if I follow these social norms, my life will be guaranteed to be eternal peace as the ultimate positive experience.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing the belief that I am moving beyond my limits when/as I move beyond the social norm limitations in applying/living an action I have previously judged to be unacceptable.
I commit myself to show that the only limits that generate annoyance and complaints – emotions/feelings of anger/jealousy/spite/hatred – are limits as JUDGMENTS about myself and my world, that I clung onto within/as defining myself according to these judgments: accepting and allowing these judgments to alter and affect my decisions.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to deliberately create an inner conflict within/as myself when I judge a potential course of action as ‘unacceptable’, THEN deliberately and specifically ask myself to break my own rules under the guise that I am apparently creating this inner conflict to do what is best for all.
I commit myself to stop the polarity game of creating negative relationships to accumulate into positive relationships, by/through instead of participating in backchat, remaining silent in/as stopping my own backchat with the tools of writing, self forgiveness, and self corrective application.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hide/suppress the want/need/desire to break rules/limitations that only I alone am capable of imposing onto myself.
I commit myself to show that I will be ashamed later for each point that I hide/suppress – regardless of the excuse given – because in time that point will be tested to see if I have done what is best for all, and every time I will fall because the hiding/suppressing itself is an indication of self interest over what is best for all.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate me into one part/angel that says this action is unacceptable, and another part/devil that says I MUST apply this action and ignore my own previous judgment; then to call ignoring judgment as apparently pushing myself to change, when IN FACT I am simply setting up a trap within/as creating a polarity and participating in my self created polarity of unacceptable/bad/negative energy experience, and acceptable/good/positive energy experience.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to derive and contrive a delusional sense of power out of the belief that when another person is silent after I have said something about them = I am more powerful and have more authority in comparison to that person.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to adopt the Self Righteous Argument Winner character as an act of revenge of past moments where I played the victim within/as being forced to remain silent, while an authority figure continues to yell/shout at me to assert his/her authority within/as anger.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing the belief that it is better to be the authority figure that yells/shouts at the victim than be the victim being shouted at; I forgive myself for accepting and allowing the belief that I will have a better and smoother experience of myself as an abuser compared to being abused.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to participate in the want/need/desire to fulfill a vague feeling of lack within/as myself, looking at everything around me and concluding myself to be lacking of many traits/advantages, instead of stopping participating in the want/need/desire to fulfill a vague feeling of lack by/through stopping the pursuit for abundance/wealth/happiness.
I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to see/realise/understand that the pursuit of happiness itself creates lack because the pursuit, as proven by time, has only been motivated by fear, spoken/preached as apparent love: so no matter how dedicated I am to this pursuit, my starting point already shows in the beginning that I will only create the end/consequence of participating in fear which is separation and the irrational survival instinct to harm.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to pursue happiness by/through playing roles that I interpreted others to have achieved forms of happiness as positive energy experience, such as the satisfied expression on a parent’s face after successfully teaching the child in yelling/screaming at the child into submission as silence.