I commit myself to when and as I see myself reacting to speaking to others through more and more layered abstractions, to stop and breathe. I realise that within/as speaking through more and more abstractions, if my starting point remains as to understand each other’s expression, my creation as the spoken statements will be in that image and likeness, I will remain here no matter what the ‘complexity’ of the communication and cannot ‘lose myself’ in the symbols. I commit myself to make sure that my starting point is clear – in absolute self honesty – and that all reactions are always brought back to myself as my perception/interpretation of what is here, such as when speaking.
I commit myself to when and as I fear being abandoned for staying the same, to stop and breathe. I realise that copying others blindly – without a clear mathematical reason for the change – most likely will result in failure and self compromise. I commit myself to bring the reaction back to Self, investigate and let go of the fear, before testing the change and when I am unclear if the change is best for all or not, I commit myself to write out the points and equate the consequences until I am clear, and then start the process of understanding what is practical to actually change myself, such as facing the barriers if they come up, facing the resistance, pushing through the resistance, within/as the realisation that real permanent change is not about doing things differently, it’s about understanding what I have already done.
I commit myself to when and as I do the same things and copy the same values to in my Mind, imagine huddling in a group for dear survival, to stop and breathe. I realise that I am choosing to be irresponsible for my own understanding of this reality when I ‘shortcut’ the process to just copy other’s actions and behaviours without ever realising the practical implications of an action, such as pumping up muscle and looking and feeling muscular and manly. I commit myself to stand by my own actions, before my actions were being questioned, to understand exactly why I have done what I have done, in this to establish a relationship of intimacy with myself, in touch with my own real expression as the actions I participate in daily.
I commit myself to when and as I am judging someone almost immediately according to ‘friend potential’, to stop and breathe. I realise that I am judging the person, according to my self interested goal of making more friends as money, and that when I do this I do not actually see the person in front of me, only the traits that I see are ‘profitable’ and the rest is ignored for the ‘dazzling opportunity’ of vicariously possessing the trait through a friendship. I commit myself to face the nature of myself when/as I participate in judging another person. I commit myself to give the other the kind of attention and acceptance that I would like to receive when meeting another person and speaking with them, so I stop participating in the internal dialogue within myself, to instead be physically here with the human body that I am actually seeing.