Reacted negatively when my mom asked me what I would like to do for lunch (eat now or later), and after I gave my answer, The Answer popped up and she was resolute in eating together after peak hours (this was at around 1.30 pm).
The point is my backchat when I said the words, “The answer is already given/predetermined, why even ask me what I want to do for lunch?”
To this my mom was quite pleased that the answer was given and that she already knew the answer.
To my interpretation, this is free choice in society in a nutshell. The answer is given, but the system must ask you what you want to begin the illusion that you chose the best option for you. When the ‘best option for you’ has always been to be submissive to the systems that are here, in this case the money system, the work system.
Anyway, back to my reaction.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to perceive myself to be a slave when I said the words, “The answer is already given”.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to tacitly accept the idea that I am a master apparently because I can want whatever the hell I want, and do whatever it takes to get what I want; for example, I want to be successful and I will win at all cost to be successful.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to take for granted the world system as the part that supports me to breathe in this reality, though it certainly does not allow me to live freely, as I ‘struggle’ for money/energy.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I am free in spite of the facts that given a set of aptitudes, I am forced to do what my aptitudes dictate because if you are not good at what you do, you will lose. Without the means to change my aptitudes, could I say that because of capitalism, I am stripped of both the time and money to change. The only freedom I am allowed because it facilitates the freedom of the system to do as it please, is ‘freedom of mind’, the freedom of choosing my automation/systems of thought, systems of being special in my emotions/feeling that I am given the space to dictate like a master to a slave, and in this wrongly perceive myself to be a master, when every indication in reality indicates that this system is a system that enslaves, so there are only slaves, which includes me in the system.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed the belief that my freedom is being ‘threatened’ when I said the words, “The answer has always been given”, instead of seeing the freedom in embracing the harsh truth that I have been preprogrammed, this world system of evolution has been preprogrammed, so the end can be predicted at the beginnning, my finish line as a person can be predicted from the beginning of myself as a seed, the resonant seed, so am I free when everything of myself is still a program, still automated and determined by my environment, very much so?
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to refuse to realize that the flesh being that reflects the reality of me, is not free, it costs money. And is subject to the thoughts, emotions, and feelings I accept and allow in my secret mind in which I deliberately keep a secret instead of exposing them in an act of accountability in blogging about these secret thoughts, as predictably I would be stronger as a character if I put such secrets behind me.