Tag Archives: exam

Day 239: Test Taking Mentality

Learning was reduced into a petty competition through the test form.  I couldn’t enjoy learning anymore – I had to compete.  I couldn’t just learn anymore = I had to be the best, perfect myself, and perfect myself.  Everyone was … Continue reading

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Day 191: School And Coercion

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed the delusion that I was changing because my routine was being manhandled by school from the perspective that to do well on a test, I would have to actually do work, … Continue reading

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Day 128: Promotion as Fear of Failure

Opening a point of promotion as preparation to succeed, seeking for more: Promotion never was in my thoughts until 10 years old. I had a person that I looked up to and wanted to be like, I wanted to achieve … Continue reading

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Day 114: Intelligent Is The Price Of Admission

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to copy and paste behaviours that I have perceived to indicate intelligence, to make myself look intelligent to try and please my mother. When/as I see myself acting out behaviours that … Continue reading

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Day 104: Studying Is Hard

Changing the study habits once and for all, by/through walking through one excuse at a time I began to define studying according to capitulating when I started being more enticed by entertainment than studying, but then my mother did not … Continue reading

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Day 100: Why The Thirst For Knowledge???

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define learning according to a secret plot to win my mother’s approval. When/as I see myself learning with the ‘hidden’ want to seek approval from an outside source such as my … Continue reading

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Day 97: The Secret, Learning Desires

Where am I defining me/a part of me within and as something or someone outside of myself? – Defining learning according to some God given ability, ‘god given’ = worth, value, confidence, trust I Forgive myself that I’ve accepted and … Continue reading

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Day 92: Learning Woes

I Forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to deliberately diminish my learning ability because I did not enjoy myself within/as learning effectively, in which I immediately projected outward onto other people who were getting similar grades to me. I … Continue reading

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Day 89: Learning Must Not Become a Culture

When learning becomes a culture, we have a generation of human beings obsessed with learning, some of which react to the below thoughts productively, while others freeze up and severely compromise themselves in their world, such as me.  Where is … Continue reading

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Day 83: Fear of Failure Within Learning, Facing Excuses

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear failure because of a memory where I had done something, and then convinced myself that I had done something absolutely wrong and therefore absolutely unforgivable, even by myself. When and … Continue reading

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