Tag Archives: fuck

Day 239: Test Taking Mentality

Learning was reduced into a petty competition through the test form.  I couldn’t enjoy learning anymore – I had to compete.  I couldn’t just learn anymore = I had to be the best, perfect myself, and perfect myself.  Everyone was … Continue reading

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Day 233: Fixating Attention On Tests

What was immediately clear when I arrived in grade school was that I was being placed into a routine.  What alarmed me was as time progressed, the demands were greater in that they required more time to be actually done.  … Continue reading

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Day 105: Studying is Not So Difficult

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define studying according to a memory where I reacted in anger to my mother for not being able to explain why I was studying continuously. When/as I see myself participating in … Continue reading

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Day 90: Learning For Profit Alone

I Forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define learning according to getting higher marks COMPARED to everyone else, in this participating in the need/want/desire to be/become more/superior in an underlying fear of being less/inferior. I realise that when … Continue reading

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Day 89: Learning Must Not Become a Culture

When learning becomes a culture, we have a generation of human beings obsessed with learning, some of which react to the below thoughts productively, while others freeze up and severely compromise themselves in their world, such as me.  Where is … Continue reading

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Day 82: Fear of Failure Within Learning

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear failure. When and as I see myself fearing failing, I stop and breathe.  I realise that the cost of participating in fear is distracting myself from what is here and … Continue reading

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Day 31: Study Habits

After studying for enough time, I stopped focusing and started being possessed by backchat. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to lose focus and be possessed by a neverending train of thoughts/emotions/feelings as backchat when I have studied … Continue reading

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Day 28: Reactive Behaviour

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hide and suppress the responsibility I have for ALL of my reactions to/towards other people. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to resort to blame as an apparently valid … Continue reading

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Day 24: Would You PLEASE Stop Talking About Me Behind My Back?!

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to consider myself to be apparently ‘right’, when I was judging others to be doing ‘wrong’. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define wrongdoing to be symbolically judging and … Continue reading

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